Vacation vixens: Why more women have sex 'like men' on holiday

You met him on vacation. He was tanned and buff with an irresistible cheeky grin. (Fotolia)

You met him on vacation. He was tanned and buff with an irresistible cheeky grin. (Fotolia)

Simone Paget, Special to QMI Agency

, Last Updated: 3:32 PM ET

 

You met him on vacation. He was tanned and buff with an irresistible cheeky grin. You flirted by the pool in the afternoon and by evening you were sharing a bottle of Pinot Noir on his balcony. Insert tequila shots here. The rest is history. When your friends ask, you tell them, “It just happened. We’ll never see each other again and it was awesome!” Ladies - you know exactly what I’m talking about: The vacation hook-up.

Those of us who haven’t had a one-night stand while on vacation, have definitely considered it. Afterall, there’s something to be said about being on vacation, away from your everyday stresses, you’re looking and feeling your best. Plus, what happens in Cabo stays in Cabo - or something.

If any of this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. A new study from the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign suggests that the sexual predilection to have one-night stands on vacation is true for some women. According to researcher Liza Berdychevsky, vacations provide women with “an altered sense of reality… while minimizing perceptions of risk and long-term consequences.” Because of this, many women reported that being on vacation makes them feel like they “have sex like a man” with “no strings attached.”

Whenever I hear the phrase “have sex like a man” my ears immediately perk up. The phrase points to the fact that there’s still very much a double standard when it comes to women and sex. “Having sex like a man” suggests that unlike men, women can’t enjoy casual sex purely for the sake of pleasure - a misconception that as a society, we’ve propagated and internalized for eons. If we’re able to free ourselves from the shame associated with double standard while basking in the glow of tropical paradise, why can’t we do the same in our everyday lives?

As Berdychevsky has learned from her research, casual vacation sex can lead to beneficial experiences, “Some learn a lesson, how to reject, how to be more empowered, how to be more vocal or how to insist on contraception.” In this sense, what happens on vacation doesn’t stay on vacation, but instead (providing that the individuals are playing safely) can lead to life affirming self-knowledge and a better understanding of one’s sexuality.

Therefore, I’m not suggesting that we live everyday like it’s Spring Break - just that we take some of that “vacation fling mentality” and apply it to our sex lives. Whether that’s having sex with our partner in the comfort of our own home or with a stranger a beach in Cabo, as long as we’re playing safe and respecting each other, there’s nothing to be ashamed of.

Sidebar: Travel and one-night stands are more common than you may think

Dating travel website Miss Travel polled 30,000 British women about their sexual behaviour on summer vacations. Over 40% of participants under 30 reported having had a one-night stand during a trip, and 10 % said that they had five or more sexual partners over the course of a week-long holiday.

Although these stats are from the U.K., they’re a good reminder that people are hooking up while on vacation and that you should be prepared to be protected - and we’re not just talking about packing sunscreen. Regardless of your gender, make sure you bring condoms and have them on hand at all times.


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